I should be DEAD!!!
When I look back at some of the choices, I’ve made, I cannot believe I am still alive. Yes, I should be dead, why? Because I was stuck in “Self-Sabotaging” my happiness and success because of the trauma, and the sexual abuse I endured as a child and young adult.
The late great Dr. Maya Angelou said; “When we know better, we do better.” To move forward with my life, my happiness and success I discovered that the only way to do that was to change my mindset about my past and more specifically my past choices and stop beating myself up because of them.
Sure, I made bad choices because of the trauma I experienced as a child and young adult. The Problem: I continued using those experiences as excuses to stay stuck in victimhood. My out-of-control self-sabotaging continued until a friend looked me in the eye and said the words that saved my life:
“You have every right to be angry about what happened to you, but you don’t have the right to stay stuck there. You have work to do and a life to live. You are not responsible for what happened to you but now as an adult you are responsible for how you choose to live your life. Stop playing the victim and start taking responsibility for your life!”
WOW, talk about a gut punch, but it worked! I discovered that to move forward with the life I wanted, that I must learn to forgive myself and doing so put me on a path of recovery and healing. Forgiving me was a healthy choice. As much as her statement hurt me in the moment, it turned out to be the greatest gift I ever received. It changed the trajectory of my life; it saved my life!
I discovered that making bad choices doesn’t make us bad people it makes us human. All our past experiences have made us into who we are, the good, the bad, and the ugly. I have to say that I like who I am becoming despite all my experiences. I am grateful for everything I have gone through. Do I still have work to do, YES, we all do, and it starts with forgiving yourself.
“Bad choices don’t make you a bad person, it makes you HUMAN!”
If you’re stuck in self-sabotage mode, lighten up and give yourself some grace and space. If you want to change your life, start by forgiving and loving yourself. Accept what you cannot change, and vow to do better. You are worthy of happiness and success and the best gift you can give yourself is to take responsibility for your life and forgive yourself for past choices that kept you stuck.
Forgiveness and taking responsibility are gifts that keeps on giving and using daily affirmations have helped me and they can help you shift your mindset into a more positive state and learn to forgive yourself. “I Forgive Myself” “I Love Me” “I Am a Good Person”
I hope my friends’ words have inspired you and now I have a gift for you. “52 weeks of Transformational Affirmations. Go to RenaRomano.com to claim your weekly gift. I would love if you re-gift this post to others whom you think might benefit from reading it.
Re-Gifting can be a good thing! Until next time I wish you Peace and Love! Ciao for Now, Rena